Quiet Confidence
Yesterday I heard someone say that to be confident (or as they put it, to have self esteem) you do what you do because you feel it is the best thing and not because someone else wants or doesn’t want you to do it. Or in other words, if someone disapproves of what you do, it doesn’t faze you because you have conviction in what you are doing. Or at least, that is my interpretation of what was said.
I have been thinking about this, and it is something I’m trying to improve in myself. My conclusion so far is that if I know my decision has been based on what I determine to be sound principles and on what I feel is right, then I can be confident in the face of criticism.
That doesn’t mean my confident decisions will always be ideal. It also doesn’t mean I should be unwilling to accept advice from others. On the contrary, I may even seek advice (and listen openly to advice I didn’t ask for) but have the courage to do what I feel is best, whether or not others agree.
What are your thoughts?
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May 1st, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Interesting ideas. I agree. I think the key to all of this is to base your confident actions on the best information possible. If you are confident about your decisions, but they are based on faulty assumptions or advice, then I’m not sure that’s a great thing, other than the fact that you have the ability to make decisions independently. I have the most confidence in my decisions when I know that God has prompted me to do something, because then I know that He will prepare a way for me to accomplish whatever he has asked me to do. I think the more a person’s decisions are based on truth, the more confident they will naturally be.
I also think it’s important that confidence doesn’t become arrogance, which might be what you mean by “quiet” confidence. Even if you know you are right about something, you shouldn’t think you are better than people who aren’t aware of the same information or principle and you shouldn’t try to force people to do what is right. If you are confident, then even people who disagree with you will respect your opinion, but if you become arrogant they will not. Confidence, as opposed to arrogance, is a great attribute to have, which I think is generally attractive to people.
May 2nd, 2009 at 10:40 pm
Quiet confidence is what you said Steve. You know inside that what you’re doing is based on correct principles. And you should feel that inside when you make those decisions. So you can be strong in the face of criticism. I don’t know if this is a religion based question… but I like the General Conference talk “Christian Courage” from last fall. Look it up. It’s awesome. It helped me over these past few months.